As of this writing, Christmas Day is only 18 weeks away. This means if you’re paid bi-weekly, you have about nine paychecks until Christmas Day this year. And even though Christmas can be the most magical time of the year, it can also bring credit card debt that hangs around until spring. As a mom of three children and an Aunt to many, I’ve found that navigating holiday spending is much easier when the whole family is on the same page early. I know this sounds awkward and maybe a little uncomfortable, but the reality is that having these conversations now will make the holidays much easier financially for everyone.
Set the Holiday Budget With Your Spouse
If you’ve followed me for a while you know that my husband and I save a little all year long for Christmas in a Sinking Fund. This helps us figure out and stick to a Christmas spending budget much easier. And before you can talk with extended family about gift expectations you’ve got to first sit down with your spouse to figure out what your holiday budget should be based on your actual financial reality.
Key points:
Review last year’s spending—what worked, what didn’t.
Decide on a total holiday budget (gifts, food, travel, activities, Christmas cards, family photos, etc).
Allocate funds by category before shopping begins.
Pro Tip: Use a shared budget tracker app or spreadsheet so both of you can see spending in real time.
Talk With Extended Family About Gift Expectations
I know this one is tough but it’s important. A few Christmases ago my brother and I had to make the decision that we were no longer buying each other’s children gifts. The reality is that my only nieces and nephews are from my brother as my brother-in-law does not have any children. But for my brother he has a dozen nieces and nephews on his wife’s side so it’s much more demanding on their family than mine. So even though this was a challenging conversation to have it was an important one – we needed to be on the same page when it came to handling Christmas gifts for our children from their extended family. And there’s nothing wrong with having similar conversations with your family.
Key points:
Suggest budget-friendly alternatives like Secret Santa, homemade gifts, group gifts (like board games or outside toys that can be used by more than one person) or experience-based gifts.
Be honest if you’re cutting back—frame it as focusing on meaning over money.
Have an Age-Appropriate Money Chat With the Kids
If this year’s Christmas is going to look different than previous years then make sure you communicate that with your children well before Christmas. For us, we’re working towards a few big goals so our Christmas budget is smaller than what it’s been in the past. For our children they know the real meaning of Christmas and that it’s about Christ and not gifts but of course, they’re still children. Disappointments can happen but I think when we communicate early and we’re honest with our children about our reality they learn to face disappointment with grace rather than grow bitter. So if your Christmas this year is going to be different than last year’s Christmas – that’s okay but definitely communicate that with your children so they’re prepared.
Key points:
Explain that the holidays are about more than gifts (especially important if the budget is tighter this year). Luke 2:10-11
For younger kids: Share a simplified version of the family’s plan.
For teens: Involve them in gift budgeting for friends or siblings.
Use this as a teachable moment about setting limits and avoiding debt.
Decide on Holiday Travel Plans Early
If you’re planning to travel for the holidays this year make sure you plan early! Look at the school calendar and determine when’s the best time for you to travel. Use an app like Hopper to help you find the cheapest times to book flights. Also, make sure you book your flights in an incognito browser. Many companies are now using AI to determine what price you’re willing to pay based on your internet activity.
Key points:
Discuss transportation, lodging, and food costs before booking.
Consider whether this year calls for smaller trips or staying home.
Factor in hidden costs like pet care or house sitters. And don’t forget about oil changes and tire rotations if you’re road tripping!
Plan for Giving and Charity
The holidays are a great time to give and are when many get serious about financially supporting charities they care about. However, I think it’s important that you plan how you’ll give. Think about this way – would you rather give a $1 to a 100 different charities or $100 to one charity? If you’re not intentional with planning your giving now you’ll end up in the situation where you’re giving willy nilly and not having the impact you hoped for.
Key points:
Decide how much of the holiday budget will go toward charitable giving.
Get the kids involved—pick a cause together or donate time as a family.
Agree on How to Handle Holiday Sales & Impulse Buys
It happens. We get caught up in the excitement of a good deal and we end up spending more than we should. And that’s okay but we’ve got to focus on the recovery. What are you and your spouse going to do if one of you spends more than was planned? Return the item? Adjust the household budget to accomdate it? Go ahead and discuss now what you’ll do in the event this happens.
Key points:
Set rules for Black Friday/Cyber Monday shopping. And don’t forget to take advantages of cashback offers from Rakuten or Fetch when you’re shopping!
Decide on a “cooling-off” period before unplanned purchases.
Remind each other of the family budget goals.
The key to wining with money isn’t in perfect money management. It’s in being proactive and planning ahead as much as possible and being willing to extend grace (both to yourself and others) when things go wrong. And by planning now for Christmas spending your family will be in a better position to enjoy all the beauty and wonder of the Christmas season.
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